• Search
  • Register
  • Log in
  • Hair Care Information » General Forum
  • When You Weren't Natural...

     

    I was just reminiscing how I saw natural hair when I wore a relaxer and realized that I saw it as positive thing most of the time. At the time, I was struggling inside with why I was relaxing my hair and it seemed like when I saw natural hair around me on campus, I just knew I would end up giving up my relaxer... even if it took me four years to do it. I believe those black women with natural hair were my confirmation that it could be me and should be me wearing my hair the way God intended me to wear it.

    I remember thinking black women who wore their hair natural were brave souls. It said to me that the woman was confident in wearing her natural hair even though the mainstream showed different. I also remember feeling envious because I wanted to break free from the relaxer and didn't have the confidence to do it. I also was paranoid, feeling like they could possibly be judging me. But I realize I was harder on myself than anyone. I just felt like they knew some secret I didn't that made them want to give up relaxers. I wonder do other non-naturals feel these things about folks who are natural.... I just realize that I am glad I saw women wearing their hair natural. It gave me the much-needed boost I needed to do what I knew it my heart was right for me.

    How did you feel when you saw natural-haired women when you wore your hair relaxed, texturized, etc.?

    -e

    #
    Member
     

    I thought that natural hair was SO healthy-looking and beautiful! I just couldn't see cutting off all of my relaxed hair! lol. I have since gotten over that drama. And found the strength in myself to do what I have known has been right for me -- and that was wearing my natural hair.

    #
    Member
     
     

    That's funny...I dont really remember seeing natural women until I went natural.

    I did used to think "nappy hair" meant "bad hair."

    #
    Member
     

    As a permie, I always admired natural hair. I didn't see a whole lot of it growing up 'cause this was the 80's & having a perm in the 80's was just the thing to do. I didn't know I could wear my hair without the perm (& that makes no sense but that's what I thought). Maybe that's why it wasn't so difficult for me to make the transition since I never thought natural hair was bad.

    #
    Member
     

    Actually when I was permed, which was only twice in my life, for total of 4 months, before I big chopped it off. I know when I was relaxed, although it looked good, and seemed healhty. It reminded me why I hated having relaxed hair.

    The first I didn't know hwat it was like, but I hated it the damn long process. I hated every minute. I looked fine for a month, then I was really Latrellding the next application, just sitting around, with something on my head, and then under a dryer for an hour. I was like, screw this. I when I went to the salon 2 months later, I had them cut it all off. And I went back to my natural state.

    Then about 2 years ago, 8 years later (I was 14 ,the first time),I decided to texturize/perm rod (white perm), same horrible stupid process, but I had to sit longer because they had to put the perm rods in. God, I hated it! And I was like..never again, no wonder I was natural for so long! I forgot my hatred of listening to the ladies jabber on, about nothing. sitting there wanting to pee, but can't. Sitting under a dryer for hours on end...ugh!! Let's just say I hate waiting for something so silly.

    Now I style my hair myself. and it takes me about 10 minutes, and I always get compliments by people. While when I had other looks going on...my mum, was the only one to compliment me, and permied cousins. My mum is natural....but with type 1 hair....so she has no clue about being kinky--naptural! But she does know how to take care of it!!

    All in all...I never thought of natural hair as anything special. Since most of my life was natural. I found nothing amazing or healthy about it. I was just having it on my head, adn it was my hair. The relaxer just wasn't going with my personality. While the natural hair fit my personage perfectly! But I did want Braids....I loved and adored tiny briads, never got it done, and now that I'm natural, never will get invisible braids, or micro ones done. But I still like looking at Braided styles!

    --Had to add a bit, since I don't think...I fully answered teh question--

    A9

    #
    Member
     

    I also thought that nappy hair was gorgious. However I always feared that if I cut my hair off that my hair would be the "bad type" of nappy hair.
    However I always remember pulling my hair into pony tails and then frizzing my hair so that it would look like a nappy puff. It was wild.

    #
    Member
     

    To be quite honest, as a permie, I don't remember thoughts running across my head when I saw a natural. I never really faced drama with my relaxed head and because of this, I felt that there was really no need for me to "do that" . Now that Im natural and loving it, nappies have become significantly more "visible" to me...

    #
    Member
     

    That's funny...I dont really remember seeing natural women until...

    Same here. I can't even say that I had negative thoughts about natural hair because I saw so few women wearing their naps.

    #
    Member
     

    I had pretty much the same thought process as I do now. Some naturals have nice styles--others don't.

    #
    Member
     

    Always admired those who did it, but thought I wouldn't look right and thought, "how would I be able to wear my hair other than short? I'll look like a boy. It'll take too long to grow." and etc. Now, even though I still can't do much to my hair, it looks nice, is healthier, and I take better care of it now than I ever did. No one can tell me NOTHIN' about nappy hair bein' bad now - I'll talk 'em down now.

    #
    Member
     

    Quote:
    I remember thinking black women who wore their hair natural were brave souls. It said to me that the woman was confident in wearing her natural hair even though the mainstream showed different. I also remember feeling envious because I wanted to break free from the relaxer and didn't have the confidence to do it. I also was paranoid, feeling like they could possibly be judging me.
    Yep, I remember thoughts of insecurity, envy, and paranoia crossing my permie mind when I began to seriously consider Abnsam.

    #
    Member
     

    I always thought that it was beautiful but I thought I could never have the guts to wear my hair like that....go figure

    #
    Member
     

    To be quite honest, as a permie, I don't...

    Same here.

    Although I do think I associated nappy hair with "earthy people".

    #
    Member
     

    I did not see any natural heads when I was permie. I rarely see a natural head now (except when there is a get together).

    #
    Member
     

    I always thought natural hair was beautiful. There were not alot of naturals around me either growing up but I do remember looking at old photo albums with my mom and aunts. Their afros were so healthy and beautiful. In the pictures they seemed to beam. However, from years in public school I new that nappy hair was frown on. The kids that didn't get their hair straightened or relaxed got clowned.

    As I got older I really started to question why I relaxed my hair and why certain "looks" were consider better than others. I also remember looking in magazine and seeing natural hairstyles. I would wonder how they got their hair like that. As I educated my self on natural hair, I realized that all of those women were wearing thier God given hair--no processing involved. It still amazes me how ignore I was about my own hair and the things it can do naturally.

    #
    Member
     

    Gosh...what a great question! Before I went natural, I used to see sistahs with natural styles and just wish that I had natural hair. I would always ask the naturals that I saw questions and Latrellm about what life would be like if I had natural hair.
    I never felt bold enought to sport natural hair in a world where many feel that natural hair ( especially is it is kinky/coily) is bad hair.

    I am so glad that I made the decision to take the journey.
    pamelac31

    #
    Member
     

    I remeber thinkin oh how i wish i could not have a perm i was terrified i'd had a curl from fourth grade till sixth then from sixth till aug 2003. I always had a perm so it was all i knew i always admired natural woman they reminded me of the strength we as black woman carry around i always thought really educated black woman had natural hair.

    #
    Member
     

    I liked how big their hair was. I love big hair and I would roll and tease my hair to try and get it as big as the hair I saw. Now, the most natural hair I saw was on the old 70s movies (Foxy Brown and Cleopatra Jones being my favs) and I started asking around, my parents in particular, about how to get my hair like that. I knew that I could handle Abnsam, but I wasn't sure about my family and friends.

    #
    Member
     

    To be honest I never thought of it in a negative way. I just thought that I couldn't do it or if I did my hair wouldn't look nice or that it was really hard for them to care for it and to get it looking good.. I'm glad I know better now : )

    #
    Member
     

    i always thought really educated black woman had natural...

    That's kind of along the lines I used to think. Even now my husband tells me I can get away with being natural because I "look smart."

    I also used to be a little intimidated by women with natural hair. Next to them I felt phony with my permed hair sticking close to my scalp. I always liked wearing my hair big and wasn't too good at keeping styles, so my perms always looked "puffy" as the beauticians like to call it. Now I realize it was just my nappy roots trying to break free.

    #
    Member
     

    I thought natural hair was really pretty. I never thought of myself actually Abnsam. I didn't think It would look good on me.

    #
    Member
     

    honestly, I never seen many nappy heads outside of locks. I liked locks but thought that if I went natural I would HAVE to get locks or a short natural (which I didnt like on me) I never thought my hair can me natural AND long!

    #
    Member
     

    I was always a little bit jealous. Women with natural hair always looked beautiful to me and, brainwashed waif that I was, I thought this was because they had "good hair." After all, only "good hair" could look that nice. Since I had "bad hair" (well, actually, I hadn't even SEEN my natural hair since who-knows-when), I was "forced" to perm it. I was a bit EvigmaKigntful of that -- of not being able to have the freedom that other women did.

    Seems pretty silly to me now in every possible way.

    ~Rochelle.

    #
    Member
     

    i thought naturally curly hair was cute, afros- real cute , but should stay in the 70's i thought twas were for women who didn't like men, and i was scared if i was natural - no guy would like me.

    BOY WAS I WRONG!!

    #
    Member
     

    Okay, I'm gonna be honest..
    Well back when I first graduated fron HS I absolutely hated locs. Any and everything about them was wrong to me. I always thought people who wore loc/Latrellds didn't wash there hair and were stinky and nasty (now i had never seen them up close at this point except of a few homeless people whose hair had become matted) Then there was a Jcrew model, who was absolutely beautiful, but he had locs. So that view was changed.
    From then I never really saw natural haired women except a few who wore it very low,(ie a fade) they were my sister's friends so they were the exception to the rules.
    Then my older sister went natural. Now I didn't ever see her until it was time for the holidays so when she came home and was attacked verbally by family members that's when I really started to LOOK at natiral hair (and became a nappy hair advocate, don't mess w/my sister . I didn't see what the big deal was and I thought it looked very cute.... on her. I thought it was hard and nappy and that all you could wear was a afro

    So I'll end this book I am writing by saying that I DID NOT like natural hair until i saw it on my sister and then when i came on this site and SAW the beauty and versatility of natural hair.

    #
    Member
     

    I never had any hate towards the naps. I just wanted my folks to keep that hot comb outta my head, so at 10 I begged for the perm.

    Just before I went natural, I began seeing the nappyheaded women in commercials with coily puffs and twistouts and such and thought, "How did they get their hair to do like that? I want my hair like that!" Also, in my early permie years, I was always experimenting with rollers to get a curly look.

    I was always questioning, "Why do I HAVE to perm?" in my head. The minute I found forum and the fact that I did NOT have to perm, it was ON!

    EnvewclesD

    #
    Member
     

    When I was little I didnt notice natural hair girls. In high school though, I had a very negative reaction towards natural haired girls. I just noticed that they all acted "white". I thought that the only reason that their hair was natural was to be different. I didnt like it at all. BUT I failed to notice my mama. Shes always worn a twa.

    I even thought that way during my senior year in high school; thats when I cut all my hair off.

    I wish I coule have appreciated the beauty of naptural hair during that time.

    #
    Member
     

    I always thought that it was beautiful but I...

    Me too. I always looked at it admiringly, and longingly(sp) Thinking one day...one day I'll gather up enough guts to do that.

    #
    Member
     

    Growing up I had never seen a natural sister or a nappy head until my 3rd year in college. (Grew up in white church, school, neighborhood, etc.) College was my 1st taste of diversity. There was one girl w/ the prettiest curls 3c and another girl 4a and I used to always admire their hairs. I kept ranting, oh I wish I wish I had curls like that or my hair would do that too. (this was when I wore braids cuz I was soo tired of perming and decided to wear braids forever until I found this site).

    #
    Member
     

    You know I don't remember seeing many naturals around when I was a permie. Occassionally I might see an older woman with a TWA but down in Texas it is straight, permed, pressed and weave Capitol! However it was a natural woman who 7lilloves4me me to imitate her style with a texturizer no less!! Didn't know any better, cut that crap out and started wearing my own hair and WOW I felt sooo good! Now I see a lot more naturals, not many but more than when I was a permie.

    #
    Member
     
    123
    RSS feed for this topic  

    Reply »

    You must log in to post.

  • Tags
  •   No tags yet.
     
    Hair Care Information. Sitemap