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  • She Said Ugh!

     

    I haven't quite figured out how I feel or even if I care. Yeah I think that I'm a tad bit irritated. My sister asked me how my hair was going and I proudly told her that it was going great and that I was locking. (We live in two different states) Her response was, "OH, Ughhh!" like she was disgusted. I laughed it off and told her that she didn't have to loc her hair, but I am locing mine. She kind of laughed and said that she just didn't know that I was, "into that." I let it go. I didn't act offended over the phone. Honestly I can remember not too many years ago when I never would have imagine locing my hair. The difference is I never thought that it was disgusting and if I did I never would have been ballsy enough to express it.

    I haven't seen my family in some time. I imagine that my mother and others will have something to say and honestly I'm grown. I'm a mother or two I don't really need their permission or for them to accept anything that I do. (We don't even talk religion anymore) But I guess I'm just a bit irritated that she thought that it was ok to say that to me.

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    I think when it's someone you love, like a family member, it will rub you the wrong way when they do stuff like that.

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    You are not on this journey to please anyone else but yourself. So if someone doesn't like it and deems it necessary to say as much, feel free to school them therefore breaking it down so it is forever broke. But if ya mom's comes at ya, say it respectfully. My own mother had her say but now she is the first to school someone and to talk about how pretty my hair is.

    P

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    My parents have been locked for more than 20 years and one of my sisters is now growing out her perm. I haven't told my parents that I am locking (probably won't until Christmas--gotta love head wraps). So my decision definitely won't be a issue. But I have found that when I do other new things that are "out of the ordinary" my family definitely express themselves w/o the concern that they are about to offend. Family is seldom polite. Like you said, you're grown. And who knows, maybe your sister will jump on board in a few years. I never thought my sister would go natural, but she's determined to do so. I just have to convince the other 2 and well be a bunch of nappyheads

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    I love it when people let me know exactly where they are coming from - fam or not that's how I look at it.

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    I know that your mad, but she's just ignorant to the process. I've had people say "ugh" to me and say "I heard that they have spiders and **** in their head." It's not for them to like, I like it and I'm living with it. It's like trying to explain a perm to a white person! It'll take time for others that aren't doing it to understand.

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    I know that your mad, but she's just ignorant to...

    I guess the thing that irritates me the most is that I didn't ASK her how she felt or if she liked it or whatever. I know that you're right. It's funny I'm somewhere on the line of not caring and being pissed off! LOL

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    I think those who don't understand our journey will be ignorant to the fact that natural hair is so beautiful and will make comments like those.

    lo

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    MsDrea, you and your hair are soooo cute. Maybe when...

    Awww thanks! Girls thanks for letting me vent. I just had to remind myself that I don't care. LOL For some reason my natural reaction was to become defensive, but really I don't have anything to defend. Thanks ladies!

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    When most people think locs they think of the homeless person on the street (I have nothing against the homeless) But you know how some of them have dreds bec they have no means of combing their hair so it locs up and looks unkempt. So they automatically think they are dirty and unkempt. They don't bother to step out of the box and realize that as with any hairstyle locs can be as neat and attractive as any other. At one time when I was considering locing my family and friends just thought it was disgusting, but their idea of locs were all misconceptions. But once I schooled them they saw locs in a whole new light. People are just afraid of what they don't understand. Enjoy your journey and don't let anyone spoil it for you.

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    ...But you know how some of them have dreds bec...

    I agree. People, even our folks, think dreads and locks are dirty. It's not only the homeless, but the Rastas they are thinking about. I don't think they have a reputation for being clean either. I am not saying they not, I am saying that is the perception.

    I did a lot of research before I decided on how I was going to lock my hair. It had to be CLEAN.

    Typoz

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    I haven't quite figured out how I feel or even...

    I know exactly how you feel. My best friend of which everyone use to say we looked alike just can't deal with the fact that I want to be natural. Right now my hair is almost locked but I acutally have decided to tke either cut them out or try and take them aloose because I just want to be completely natural. When I told her I was thinking of changeing my hair she said"Thank God I was wondering we you would get tired of thiis phase" and when I had to correct her and let her know that I was not going back to the Crack(perm) she just said oh! You know I don't get it I use to think men had hangups when it came to a womans hair now I think it's women more than men. In a way I would like to just go for a big chop and start all over. I just want a change for my up coming "B'Day" at any right just keep you head up and stay focused it's not for others to undrstand it's uyour journey.

    Miss.Mathsl :

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    I would have asked her (in a nice way) "what do you mean by 'ugh'?"
    Like previous posters have said, there are SO many misconceptions about dredlocks and the people that where them.
    One thing is for sure, I definitely said "Ugh!" to the hideous egg/fart smell of LYE when I used to go to the beauty shops! I would definitely say "Ugh!" to someone with very old "weave/bonded" hair that they feel so self-conscious about not wearing that they never take it out and their scalps stanks! And to be honest, I always say "Ugh!" to the broads in the rap videos who CONSISTENTLY wear that ugly straight/stringy long weave: trying to imitate an ethnic group they are definitely NOT.
    Why do I say Ugh in these situations? Because these are instances of black people not loving who they are and possibly putting their own health at risk for certain "LOOK."
    You go girl, and keep wearing your locs and keeping them healthy. I bet when they reach down your back all of your family members will be like "Whoa! How she do that!" ointlaugh:

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    Right... in the words of the other posters -- don't trip.

    When my moms and I were driving about, she looked at my head and was like, what are you going to do with it?? I've been locking now for almost seven months. I was like, what do you mean, what am I going to do with it??? She was like, it looks dead. I just laughed at her ig'nant azz, before I responded with, well, I'm not dead, so I suppose my hair isn't either. Her response: well, it's growing.
    I have already sounded the alarm. When my locs are down to my ankles, don't say ish. Just bow your heads in stupidity and the harsh reality that you didn't know that the hell you were tawkin about.
    Girl, do yo thang and let them locs speak for you. You don't have to say a word.

    One Love,
    Nyckei

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    Right... in the words of the other posters -- don't...

    Thanks ladies!

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    Luckily all of my family and most friends were all for me locking. I can however imagine how it would be hurtful to have a sister say something negative about my hair. I am sure that by this time next year her ughs will turn into wows... Nikki

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    eventhough she is your sis, I thuink that you handled it well. Dont let the negativity get to you!!!!!!!

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