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  • I Need Help....!

     

    Somebody help me - don't worry, I'm not going to whip out a bucket of perm on the girl, but I really need some help. She has split ends out the wahzoo and long hair (past her shoulders). When she blows it out - the afro she has would rival anything Angela Davis would ever have. I can't comb it out at all......I try to section it in small pieces but even they are tangled. I two strand twist it, but that makes it worse. The whole day (literally at least 4-6 hours) can be taken up with just combing. She hates it, I hate it and we all wind up crying at the end. I use a detangler and always comb it wet - nothing helps. She is almost 13 and we need some help. If I can get her hair to the point where she can comb it at least once a week it would be great but I can't take 4-6 hours just for that - let alone the shampooing and styling after that. We can be set back 8+ hours just for hair Help!!!

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    My baby sis's hair is the same way. I braid her hair every Sunday, (sometimes every other Sunday depending on the style), to last the week. When I'm ready to wash, I put Aveda leave-in conditioner on each braid to soften, let it sit a bit, then take the braid loose, continue until I get about 6-8 bigger sections that I put in loose plaits. Wash each section
    with Carol's Daughter Rosemary Mint Shampoo, rinse good, more Aveda, then loose plait again. Then I'm able to part hair and re-braid.
    Once a month I deep condition with whatever I got on hand, put plastic on head, let her sit about 30 minutes, wash out, and on to the process again.
    She has Down's Syndrome, never complains, so never know when something is hurting her, but shrugging her shoulders does give me an idea.

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    My baby sis's hair is the same way. I braid her hair every Sunday, (sometimes every other Sunday depending on the style), to last the week. When I'm ready to wash, I put Aveda leave-in conditioner on each braid to soften, let it sit a bit, then take the braid loose, continue until I get about 6-8 bigger sections that I put in loose plaits. Wash each section
    with Carol's Daughter Rosemary Mint Shampoo, rinse good, more Aveda, then loose plait again. Then I'm able to part hair and re-braid.
    Once a month I deep condition with whatever I got on hand, put plastic on head, let her sit about 30 minutes, wash out, and on to the process again.
    She has Down's Syndrome, never complains, so never know when something is hurting her, but shrugging her shoulders does give me an idea.

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    Member
     

    My baby sis's hair is the same way. I braid her hair every Sunday, (sometimes every other Sunday depending on the style), to last the week. When I'm ready to wash, I put Aveda leave-in conditioner on each braid to soften, let it sit a bit, then take the braid loose, continue until I get about 6-8 bigger sections that I put in loose plaits. Wash each section
    with Carol's Daughter Rosemary Mint Shampoo, rinse good, more Aveda, then loose plait again. Then I'm able to part hair and re-braid.
    Once a month I deep condition with whatever I got on hand, put plastic on head, let her sit about 30 minutes, wash out, and on to the process again.
    She has Down's Syndrome, never complains, so never know when something is hurting her, but shrugging her shoulders does give me an idea.

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    Thanks anabwi: That sounds like a good plan to me! I have heard about the Aveda products but have never tried them. Next time I will be braiding and not two strand twisting. I will give it a shot! Thank you so much!

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    My daughter's hair can be challenging too. What I've done a few times before shampooing is saturate her hair with coconut oil overnight. I use a lot of oil, mostly on the ends and middle of her hair. Her hair is put into a loose pony tail, covered with a plastic cap and tied with a scarf. The next day when she's ready to shower I use a moisturizing shampoo. I've been using $1 conditioners, Suave Milk & Honey, because my daughter has a lot of hair and uses about 1/2 bottle each time. Pile hair loosely on top of her head. I let the conditioner soak in for a good 10 minutes or so while she showers. Using a big shower comb I proceed to comb hair from ends to roots. There are times when my daughter's hair gets super matted in the very middle of her head, mostly when she asks to wear her hair out. I always warn her before hand that we're going to have a hard time when comb-out time rolls around. She's willing to deal with the comb-out sessions anyway.

    Another suggestion I'd like to make is a detangler product that Qhemet Labs makes. I bought their sample pack a few weeks ago and that detangler is no joke. I used some on a portion of my daughter's hair that refused to budge. The tangles were slipping out as soon as I worked some of that product in it. Good stuff!

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    If she has as much hair that you are speaking about then the time that it takes to wash, detangle and style sounds about right. That is just the way it has to be if you want to manage long hair. It also sound like she may need a nice trim about 1 inch or so. Usually when my hair started acting super tangly, I just need to trim.

    You may also want to try no pooing.

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    Gosh, didn't mean to triple post, sorry !!

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    Big hugs all around. These are all great suggestions and yes, she does have all that much hair. I wish I had a picture of her 'blow-out'! Whew, it makes me tired just thinking about it! I may check out the lab sampler and I will definitely get with the conditioner and may even try the no poo during the winter (she sweats waaaaay to much to do it in the summer). I do have her scheduled for a cut - which she needs very badly. Thanks again ladies for all your help!

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    Trust me...I've been to tangle city before . Try Africa's Best Shea Butter detangler for kids. This product helps me a lot! Try detangling her hair with this and some type of spray in detangler or conditioner ( I use the Johnson's baby detangler mixed with a little warm water, honey and olive oil...works well so far). Then just put her hair in a few braids before bed. HTH!

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    Wow, 4-6 hours for detangling is very long. My hair is on the longer side - about 4 inches past my shoulders when stretched - but it takes me 15 minutes to detangle in the shower. I would highly recommend detangling her hair while it's drenching wet and completely saturated with conditioner (I've found Herbal Essences Replenishing Conditioner and Sally's Generic version of Paul Mitchell's The Detangler to both be very good for detangling). I take 5 minutes to thoroughly apply the conditioner, then do my other shower stuff in order to give the conditioner time to saturate. Finally I will come back and detangle, which takes 10 minutes.

    I use a denman knock-off Goody brush for the first round of combing. It has plastic bristles and looks just like this except with a beige handle:

    I will thoroughly brush my hair from underneath (so at the nape) going upwards, and then from the top (at the crown) going downwards, just to ensure that all layers of my hair get combed. I know I'm done when the brush stops catching snags in my hair. Then I follow this up by combing with a wide-tooth, seamless comb that I bought at Sally's. Here's a picture:

    This gets out any remaining tangles. If I come across a particularly difficult tangle, I grab the section of hair that it's in, then comb the section in fractions from the bottom moving up. So comb the bottom 1/4. Then comb the bottom 1/2. Then the bottom 3/4. Then the entire length of the section. During this whole time, my hair still has a lot of conditioner in it and the water is running on it - because this helps ease the detangling too.

    I do this once a week, or once every 2-3 weeks depending on what style my hair is in. As for styles, I would suggest medium-sized twists started off at the root with braids. I've found twists to be my ultimate solution to having to deal with my hair more than once a week. But you mentioned that you've already tried twists without success. Maybe you could try to examine how you're twisting to see if your technique is causing the tangles?

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