• Search
  • Register
  • Log in
  • Hair Care Information » General Forum
  • Grown men with braids

     

    Hell, truth be told. I'm not a fan of box braids. Period.

    but i love twists...

    #
    Member
     

    Hell, truth be told. I'm not a fan of box...

    Oh no you di'int! Proud warriors wore those braids. How darest thou!!

    #
    Member
     
     

    Hell, truth be told. I'm not a fan of box...

    Me TOO!!!!! But I darest not say it out loud or be called a hypocrite.

    #
    Member
     

    it's very hard to not look like a little kid with boxed braids. i usually feel like i'm 10 when i first put a set in which i why i quickly run to the shower to wash them till they get some fuzziness to them

    i think the stigma with men and braids in the professional world is because not only are braids seen as being more effeminate but they are also seen as being childish

    Quote:
    They're considered sexy to me when they're long and thick and my eyes like them. They're more accepted b/c they are long and thick and my eyes like them. Braids, not so much b/c they aren't long and thick and my eyes don't like them. (This reminds me...I'm baffled when folks ask why you don't like a particular food. LOL! Shoot, it just doesn't taste good. End of story. Having a definite reason isn't going to make it taste any better.)
    yup. why is everyone required to like everything? if you don't like something then you don't like it and it could very well be because of double standards. i mean i like hot buttered popcorn, but i really really hate it in jelly belly jelly beans

    #
    Member
     

    This reminds me...I'm baffled when folks ask why you don't...

    If you were a chef, your distaste for particular foods would be most relevant. If you can prove, as a chef, that your food allergies and/or "dislikes" wouldn't interfere with excellence therein, so be it. However, you may be required to efficiently render meals of the like regardless of your personal preference. In the middle of an interview, a lack of reasoning and/or rationale (even for something as minute) is far more substantive toward further exploration of one's perception skills.

    Now, if none of these people who have prejudices referred to as personal preferences about braiding techniques used on males are:
    1) Parents
    2) Teachers
    3) Employers
    4) Managers
    5) and/or an authority of any kind beyond social

    an inability to judge character given and/or disregarding predetermined attributes would be as immaterial as one might be of self. Otherwise, it would seem extremely telling and alarming for ignorance to be so prevalent among those who birth, sleep with, and are blood kin with so many of those offered toward this case.

    Surely, it shouldn't be an extra step to verify the accreditation and work history on one's CVC. That being so and everything else equal, braiding techniques should be difficult to factor in (especially given these gold toothed, thuggery depictions which wouldn't apply readily to that market). This is presuming that we haven't all conceded to not employ, mentor, childmind, be related to, and/or interact with any of those people who have braided hair and can work on the nice parts of the plantations.

    #
    Member
     

    I'm not forcing my views on anyone. A woman has...

    Well said. (although sometimes I wear two low puffs tied together) But then again, I'm not in the corporate world. I have never thought everybody should like all my hairstyles. My husband never wants me to wear short hair. That is his own taste and I don't berate him about it or call him a racist. I like my hair longer anyway so it works out well.

    Why can't people have their preferences?

    #
    Member
     

    If you were a chef, your distaste for particular foods...

    Enjoy your long hair. Personally I see it as very feminizing, but why would you care what I think? Just don't be shocked if some of your long haired bros don't get the job they are looking for. You can talk all you want but that won't change the fact that many people consider long hair unprofessional and/or sissified.

    #
    Member
     

    Hell, truth be told. I'm not a fan of box...

    As someone wearing box braids at this very moment I am highly offended. I feel that we naturals must stick together and love and appreciate all natural hairstyles. If you can't appreciate my box braids then you don't appreciate your own wash and go...so there

    *decides to skip movie night with the boo to undo and wash hair*

    #
    Member
     

    This is presuming that we haven't all conceded to...

    I agree with this..this is the crux of the issue..so many are bandying about terms like 'thats just how it is'..or if you want to get ahead you have to conform to certain standard of appearance..maybe we need to examine who dictates these constructs of acceptability..
    Its ridiculous to say definitively that a man sporting any kind of natural hairstyle IS or will be perceived to be a certain way..surely the way the man carries himself and maintains his hair (ie it neat etc) will contribute to his image..

    the only hairstyle I find absolutely repulsive on black men is perms/texturisers, so gross..so so gross..euwwww..*imagines touching it* EUWWWWWWWWWWW..

    #
    Member
     

    Enjoy your long hair. Personally I see it as very...

    If we shared identical perspectives, our confidence would be that of a well tuned political harmony. As is, I'm an intellectual and our confidence is that of a truce, in spite of the powers I possess. You don't have a gun to the back of my head nor control famine in my region (that I know of as yet), however I still would like to appreciate your voice. I don't need you to appreciate of mine, as I don't await justice of others rather than challenge and sustain it of self. Share, Sis. My skin is thick and my hair will be.

    #
    Member
     

    Honestly,
    I'm not a fan of ANY male over the age of 12 wearing braids.
    Not because of any stigma attached to it....just because there is something SO sexy about a GROWN man just coming from the barbershop, fresh shape up....yummz! lol
    NOTHING sexy about a man jut getting his braids touched up....IMO. lol

    #
    Member
     

    CoilyCurly, thank you and I guess I'm as boring as you... I don't understand why any negative opinion we may have automatically stems from being brainwashed by the former slave masters. It's not always that deep.

    #
    Member
     

    This thread has been very interesting. It's like I'm seeing the board anew. I know that when women come in with their concerns that others will stereotype them or criticize their hair, they're often told to be strong in who they are, and to stop caring about what others think. But I don't remember these "that's how society is" and "people have their own preferences" parts. They might have been there, but comments about critics' ignorance and such are what stand out in my mind. Anyway, I'll pay closer attention in the future.

    #
    Member
     

    I think the difference stems from people not seeing men wearing long hair as the same as women wearing natural hair. If you ignore that, then yeah, it's gonna seem strange, I suppose.

    #
    Member
     

    Electra - there's a lot of stuff in here, so I don't know if you're responding to me. I'm thinking of women who are scared to have particular styles, not just natural hair in general. Especially women who are scared that black men won't like them if they have TWAs, or that they'll get crap at the job for an afro. I remember a woman struggling to get rid of her wig and wear her puff at work getting a lot of support. There's a woman with a thread on the board right now who says people were laughing at her 'fro. So far, no one has said "that's just the way it is." But hey, it might happen.

    #
    Member
     

    Electra - there's a lot of stuff in here, so...

    My bad. Should've quoted or at least done the ^^ thing.
    I can't really think of a thread where a woman was more afraid of wearing a particular style than she was of wearing natural hair in general. I don't remember all the details of the "laughing" thread off hand, but I think the OP simply said: they laughed at me bc I was natural. The lady with the wig, for me that falls under struggling to be accepted for what you are...without all the extra. Her puff is her basic self...she should be accepted for her basic self--so she has my support in that. Extra for a natural woman (to me) would be like...a mo-hawk or designs cut into the hair or a half loc'd half shaven head...something like that I wouldn't go to bat for and I wouldn't call opposition to racist. It's extra.

    I just don't see natural hair as a "style"...the same way I don't see my skin color as a style...it's just how I was born, and being accepted as you are should be a given for everyone. When we start adding in all the accouterments though...I think it does become personal preference and sometimes you have to pit your personal against societal preference. That's not something that only black men with braids have to deal with...it simply doesn't seem special to me.

    #
    Member
     

    How is it not natural to not take a pair of clippers to your scalp and so happen to braid the hair out of one's face (for instance)? Why wouldn't we support all hairtipsforme and related activism or enlightenment, regardless of gender?

    It would seem as unusual as women not chemically altering their hair, for males to stand up against the taming of their hair. However, this isn't about popularity or is it? If a female forum member is attending college and says that she BC'd and doesn't want to grow her hair back out to get her career started, it would be insane for a male poster to stop through and comment that he: 1) wouldn't find her sexually attractive 2) would find her sexually attractive 3) finds her sexually attractive, but unemployable 4) would employ her because no one finds her sexually appealing/threatening. Granted, I've seen male posters do stuff similar, but vanity blinds people who should have taken offense. I can't knock it, as it worked, but iCan't. lol...It's too base and ig'nant.

    It could be someone's truth but it wouldn't be far fetched to presume that his biscuits might get burnt before we have a chance to peacefully exchange perspective with him. Yet, it's inconceivable that people who have endured a choice to let themselves and their follicles be great would only tolerate males who do likewise. If the truth is exposed, it's not that serious anymore. GTFOH, at your own leisure, of course. =)

    It is seriously irrelevant, as it is irrelevant that I'm not gay when I stand against discrimination of people who aren't heterosexual. Not having the capacity to employ people and not being sexually attracted to people who have made a completely irrelevant personal choice otherwise, doesn't excuse an allowance of discrimination. There's some saying about not standing up and falling for anything. Add what goes around comes around and all that jazz, then when you face the music, remember that we saw you here and we'll be seeing you there too. It is what it is, regardless what the white people say is normal and/or acceptable. If you have no power nor causation, you're just a commentator for white people or dissension. I'm not interested in extremes or norms, per se. This is about hairtipsforme and the big picture that resonates through more empowerment for women and other people who "get it".

    The buck doesn't stop with women who have short hair not always being gay and being gay not being bad just because some women who have short hair will proclaim that they aren't. The buck doesn't stop with loc'd males showering women herein with praise, when they're not busy working at some plantation and baby-wearing. I would die for the preservation of any one of your true liberties yet people wave their hands and shrug off mine. I'm not asking folks to engineer righteousness. Just recognize it or fall back. Nobody cares who you're willing to sleep with. We're talking about people being free to apply their trade and going unmolested by predominant ignorance (if we can help it). I don't take it personally, but I do take it as being a truth. It's not an accusation, it's recognition. Be honest.

    If most of you knew what feminine and masculine really were, we wouldn't have hairtipsforme and white people would be stripped of their authority. Their power herein is foolishness of this very sort. Sensuality, Human Rights, Parenting, and Professional skills do not stem from a hair style, but each can be challenged by one? I was disappointed the last go 'round. This time, I'm just kicking perspective and moving on. If this is a game of throwing whomever isn't here to stand up for themselves under the bus, this whole experiment is a fail. I would have figured it out with or without the charades.

    #
    Member
     

    I say EFF' it! If you're a man and want to wear your hair "long hair don't care" then sling it, braid it, loc it, fro it, and grow it honey! You have to live for yourselves. Hair is NOT a measure of manhood. Yes society has attached sterotypes to braids and/or long hair on men, black men in particular. However, the more we see these styles on strong positive images of men, the more these stigma's will change. As for now do YOU. Just like some women prefer short hair and that's okay. I suggest preferring a woman that likes your hair the way it is. Life is only what you make it and the rest is usually bullshitz.

    #
    Member
     

    I haven't read through all of the posts but I have to say this is a very interesting conversation. I get that some people do not care for particular styles on men...I think it's vice versa...

    I don't know if I am going too deep or to the left with mine lol but the same people that judge our people for having braids in a light of negativity, criminals and unprofessional are the same ones who has done the most to destroy. To me the opposite is better; I'd rather a man doing what he wants with his hair versus trying to be a clone of jay z or anyone else out there and being fake. When I see the corporate criminals and the ones who have done the most harm, they look as if nothing is wrong with them... hmmmm...

    I know that was probably left field but I do get tired of our people being judged...and expected to be clones of beyonce (for women)...That's why I love Np because we all do our own thing and have our own mind. Freedom smells so good.

    On topic: I like anything that has a swagger attached...all things can be rocked with the right person rocking it!

    #
    Member
     

    How is it not natural to not take a pair...

    Appreciate this post. I made a comment a while ago (eons ago as far as this lengthy thread is concerned) asking someone to "convince me" of their opposing pov. That person did not and apparently could not. You did Intell. I'm sorry if this thread made you feel...unwelcome/marginalized/unappreciated on this site. I look forward to reading what others have to say in response to your post...I hope it doesn't get glossed over--perhaps I'm missing a glaring flaw in your logic and someone else will point it out. For now, I bow out.

    #
    Member
     

    You were right on with your analogy (bob cut: braid...

    Co-sign......

    #
    Member
     

    Even though appearence should'nt even matter when pertaining to a job enviroment, by natural default it does.

    From a personal standpoint i don't think it should matter what kind of hairstyle you sport.

    I suppose generally speaking, braids do look a bit "young", for lack of a better word. However that view of braids is just as perverted as a negative view of natural hair.

    People shouldn't be afraid to be individuals. That being said, are still going to be judged based off of a general standard of appearance. Thus a person is more likely to be overlooked for not meeting said standard, than if they were simply apart of the "machine". It's the way society works.

    Even me, only being in highschool, i can often tell that people look at my hair cut and don't take me serious. However when it actually comes down to the work, i perform well above the general populace.

    This just means that for men who want to wear a "different" style like braids, (even locks can fall into that category) and be apart of the of the "upper echelon" of the workforce, they have to be willing to work a bit harder in proving themselves.

    #
    Member
     

    Even though appearence should'nt even matter when pertaining to a...

    {{{{{{{{{{{{{clapping}}}}}}}}}}}} Well said

    #
    Member
     

    Appreciate this post. I made a comment a while ago...

    Ok maybe i missed something. What are the two sides of the arguement?

    #
    Member
     

    {{{{{{{{{{{{{clapping}}}}}}}}}}}} Well said...

    Thank you.

    #
    Member
     

    I've just read the first 10 pages of the thread and don't have the energy to finish up right now. Just wanted to pop in and mention that Terence Trent D'Arby was mighty fine back in the days. :-) (I was still a child when he first came out, so I guess plenty of posters are too young to have known that era!) He does rock locks theses days...

    #
    Member
     

    Ok maybe i missed something. What are the two sides...

    Sorry Charlie I refuse to (attempt) to condense the 2+ sides of this debate into a single post. I couldn't do them all justice and besides...wouldn't you rather read for yourself and develop an opinion on your own without whatever my personal opinion is intruding?

    #
    Member
     

    Intellexual, I really appreciate your post and agree with your input. When I cut my hair everyone hated it and said it looked manly. I put on my earrings and a little make up and I recieved less negative comments. It was my journey. I dressed classy and professional at work and it all comes together. I believe it could be the same for a man, its the total package. Someone said they did not like braids on men but if he had everything else tight it wouldn't matter but if he was sagging had long braids and gold teeth its a definate no no. Men to go thru their own hair journeys and styles. If he had long braids pulled back and a suit and tie on looking professional, he just might get the job and the woman can over look his hair just like some men didn't like our hair choice but approached us because we were put together well.

    #
    Member
     

    Personally I don't find long hair attractive on men unless it's locs. That is my personal preference. Just like some men prefer women with straight hair and don't find natural hair attractive. It's all about preference.

    #
    Member
     

    Whether you are natural, processed, relaxed, etc., there is a "professional-looking" style for your hair. IMO, the man with braids should either have them so neat and tight that they look drawn-on, or take the braids out and trim his fro so that it is perfectly neat and even.

    In a business setting, especially at the job interview stage, the goal should be to call more attention to yourself than to your hair. Once you establish yourself, then you can get less conservative with your appearance after there is no doubt your importance and status.

    I plan on trimming my hair at least a couple of inches for my academic job interviews so that it just medium sized and a little less "glam."

    #
    Member
     
    178910
    RSS feed for this topic  

    Reply »

    You must log in to post.

  • Tags
  •   No tags yet.
     
    Hair Care Information. Sitemap